When?

Everyone is in bed and my mind is spinning with the bajillion things I need to get done this week.  Funny, I just  made a list of calls and things I need to do tomorrow and broke it down into sections...when I get up...when the kids are resting after lunch....when I'm making dinner.

When, when, when....

There always seems to be something that needs to be done sometime, or maybe it's sometime that needs to happen for something to be done?  My mother passed away a couple of months ago after a short battle with cancer and I kept telling myself that "when this is over, I need to take better care of myself".  This being the sea of doctor appointments and then funeral arrangements and then cleaning out the house and then paying the last minute bills.  This never really is over.  It just slowly transitions into something else...quietly in the night when nobody is watching, all of a sudden there is another THIS, and the conversation starts again that when this is over, I'll take better care of myself.

I've been tired, oh, so tired, and I think it's the end result of the past few months all coming down at once.  Maybe it's a little bit of depression, too, that's making me feel so tired.  I feel like I need to learn all over again how to make good meal decisions to optimize fuel for my body.

No more whining.  Not when this or that...but now...right now...and it's time to start with a good night's sleep.